My Barack, his Michelle.

On perhaps one of the most accidentally romantic weekends of my life comes an incredible moment of clarity the following week. My mind reeling from a nearly disastrous trip, filled with life experiences and lessons, I appropriately identified what I, Oriel Martin, wants for my future.  As the presidential election of 2012 looms, I am constantly bombarded by Republican speeches, Democratic speeches, and all the people who love them. I am definitely on the fence when it comes to either side's personal policies, but one thing is for sure; I am all about equality for everyone. I guess that is why I tend to gravitate to the Democratic party. Though truthfully, the sole reason has very little to do with politics, but mainly the people who are in office. I believe that President Obama and his family are the most organic, authentic, and genuine people to ever grace the White House. With every speech and every interview, I love the Obamas a little more. Most ignorant people would say, "You only like the Obamas because you are black." That could not be further from the truth. The Obamas simply magnify what I adore about commitment romantically. They truly seem to be in love and as a hopeless romantic who has always wanted that, I cannot help but love this quality about them. Asides from the mere fact that this family is the American Dream, they are real. It is not about net worths, getting America "back American," or beating the opponent, it is about what is good for everyone! They are people who come from modest beginnings, people like me who were once deeply entrenched in financial debt from college, people who strived to make an excellent future for themselves because their parents raised them to be so, and people who have faith that with opportunity EVERY AMERICAN CAN BE GREAT! What is not to love about any of that? I cannot seem to find one single thing. As I fall deeper in love with the man who currently has my heart, I think about Barack Obama and how he always kisses his wife, tells her she is the greatest mother, congratulates her, and thanks her for just being his rock, and I think; that is what I want. This weekend and this night reassured me that my vote will most definitely be with the Obamas. And it not mainly because of all their political beliefs, but their love which has hypnotized me into believing that my man could be my Obama and I could be his Michelle. It doesn't get any better than that!

Clipped Wings

Dear little 7 year old me,

I know you are young and blissfully unaware of the future that awaits, but trust me, YOU CAN DO IT! You are strong, smart, funny,  & charming; this will never change. I want you to know, no matter how scared you get about your life, God always will and has always had your back. You are one of his children and he will never forsake you.

Things in your home were not always ideal, but it will get better with time. Though rocky times may await you, be patient, better days will come. You have and will always shined like the star you are.

Most big stars have to overcome adversity before they reached success. Again, be patience. Your seventh birthday was extra special because this was the first time you got a "big girl birthday card" with $50.00 from Mima and Papa!

You loved that glittery, bunny card so much you kept and still have it at 25! You lost your first front tooth. It was a weird time because no little girl likes to be "snaggle toothed," but you are still beautiful!

I must apologize to you doll face. I did not protect you the way I should have. I did not always give you a fighting chance to avoid conflict or trouble. I was selfish with you, giving away your light to undeserving people who wanted to steal your glimmer. For all these things, I ask for your forgiveness on so many levels because I definitely did not keep my promise to cherish you as I should have. 

With all that has happened, I just want to tell you that I love you incessantly. You are exactly who God intended for you to be. He wanted you to be great, incredible, and radiant! Be great! Be glorious! Be happy! Everything that is meant for you will be. Trust me sweetie....

xoxo 

Oriel Martin 

Woman Thou Art Loose!

I always feel every single time I go to church, the message is tailor made for me. Today was no different. As I sat in church today trembling in deep thought, I remember the lowest point I had reached in my life some 4 years ago. Everything was upside down and inside out. I prayed for resolution and could never get what I desperately wanted. I realized now that I was not praying for the right things. I was praying for a quick fix and not an eternal change. I just wanted the current pain to dissipate, not permanently relish. All the while I was praying for a solution, I was still doing the same awful things. The Almighty had to let me struggle a little more to realize that all I needed was him, not more money, more men, more acting jobs, just him. Just as Rome was not build in a day, deliverance does not happen overnight; it takes time. I spend a great deal of my time in church reflecting on my past and my future. I often cry when thinking about where I started as a person and where I have been. I often felt shame about my mistakes and shortcomings, but not anymore. Today's message was incredible. The message was "you are not what you do, you are not your past. Shake away those things that hold you back from being great. Be loose!" I immediately began crying thinking about my many failures as a human being and wondered what was in store for me in the near future. Once that message was delivered, I stopped thinking so hard and just began to cry. I began to think about all the times God supported me, loved on me even when I didn't love myself, carried me through burning hot flames, and guided me through treachery times. I do serve an awesome savior and I have a testimony. I have a prophecy and I have a purpose! Thank you Lord for finally opening my eyes! 

Full Circle

Nothing makes me more uneasy than not having assurance that I am doing the right things in my life. I have a hard the accepting things I feel could be better or working on my short comings. I am getting better, but it is a daily struggle. Well, with all the happiness in my heart, I finally see some incredible breakthroughs! I recently committed to improving my health and making a "lifestyle change." It is one of the best decisions I have ever made. I started by making a pact with myself to ALWAYS keep my health first because nothing else can be successful or positive if that is not in tact. I spoke with a close friend of mine last year and we discussed our health challenges. He told me how he wanted to loose weight and was desperate for change. He was so desperate, he even considered getting a major procedure called gastric bypass. I prayed he would not do such a drastic thing. We spoke a few months later and he told me that he started to go to an herbalist in Los Angeles by the name of Dehuty Mataara. This herbalist is world renown for curing deadly diseases such as AIDS or even pesky diseases such as Genital Herpes. He is incredibly respected in his field for many herbal cures and remedies, but what he is known for is his famous Full Body Detox. This detox is unbelievable. The concept is simple; no man made drugs or "vitamins", just herbs, organic fruits and veggies, and a raw foods diet. I listened to my friend who was struggling with possibly having this expensive and very dangerous procedure to reduce fat tell me how just doing the Full Body Detox changed his life forever. He has since lost over 40 pounds, is a vegetarian, and has truly revolutionized his life. His testimony inspired something in me to change. I respected that he made a firm commitment and stuck with it. Something in my pride for me inspired me to change permanently. I knew my health was ok, but not the best. I was feeling sluggish, tired, and energy less daily.  I did not know what the cause of these feelings could be, but I knew I needed to do something and fast. My friend suggested I try herbal treatment of my maladies and see if I would experience a change as well. I decided to commit to a change. I ordered my herbs on the website, called the herbal therapist, created a journal, and went for it! So far......IT HAS BEEN THE BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE!!! I started my first of two cleanses at the end of July. I have since completed the cleanse and I have so much to be thankful for. I have lost 16 pounds, my health has improved greatly, and I feel amazing. Everywhere I go, all my friends and family keep asking me, "what have you been doing?" I have heard it all, but the one thing I constantly hear is how great I look, but what people cannot see is how great I feel. I have made a conscious effort to change my LIFE for good. I feel so blessed and thankful for what God has brought me through. Some days I feel I was not deserving, but he showed me differently. I am so grateful for this decision. I look forward to what is to come in my future. Who knows, maybe a Magna Cum Laude graduation, a new car, new career, a marriage, or maybe even some kids. Not necessarily in that order though....

A Queen Always Trumps a Joker!

The one thing I love most about summer is the Summer Olympics when they come every 4 years! There are so many fantastic things to look forward to; Track & Field, Soccer, Badminton, and my personal favorite Gymnastics. I think love gymnastics so much because I know it is something I could never do. The skill and tenacity these women possess while performing these daring feats is nothing short of mesmerizing. They are like little flying goddesses that move so gracefully and with such ease. Most years I am excited, but this year I was glued to the screen because my favorite, new darling blew me away! Gabrielle Douglas has managed to reaffirm my excitement for my favorite sport! A gymnast most of her life, Gabby was gifted from the start. Her passion and love for the sport was evident by all her coaches. Like most athletes, Gabby doubted herself in her weak moments, but she refused to give up. Her mother saw the potential and allowed her to move halfway across the United States and live with her coach where she could eventually reach Olympic potential. Her mother was very brave because I am not sure I could have done the same thing. Well, her decision was a successful one because GABBY JUST WON 2 GOLD MEDALS AND MADE HISTORY! She is the first American woman to ever win a gold medal in the all-around and team competitions, the first African-American to win the all around, and her team is the second in Olympic history to win the all-around for America. Gabby's story of struggle, faith, and perseverance should be all that matters. Unfortunately, there are certain individuals who continue to spew pure hate with their venomous comments about her hair! THIS GIRL MADE HISTORY AND ALL PEOPLE CAN THINK ABOUT IS HER HAIR? I personally believe in the quote that; a wise man speaks when they have something to say and a fool speaks because they have to say something. To all the fools who have something disgusting to say about Gabrielle Douglass; while you're sitting around commenting on a young girl, that same girl is making history, leaving her mark on the world, and getting ready to become a MEGA star. If you are going to continue to be fools, you better come up with better things to say because she will always come with something better for you fools to discuss. 

Truth

I have never had so many epiphanies in one week. I must be going for some kind of record! Last week, I spent a great deal of my days reflecting and realizing little truths. Truth; I am not a 9 to 5er. I probably never will be and that is ok. Truth; I have talents and I must share them with the world. I cleverly mapped out a way to do said things. Truth; I grow restless with creativity. A creative soul must have many outlets to release their artistic juices. I have toyed with the idea for months now and I feel it is time to acquiesce. It is time to seize the many opportunities that come with youth and high spirits. As I have said thousands of times before, I must speak my truth. The truth is; I love creating and I love entertaining. I have decided after months of doubts, I would start my own radio show. I dreamt about it since Spring of 2010 and now I feel there is no better time than the present to make it official. I launched my radio show called Vie; It's Complicated last night. I HAD TWO CALLERS! I WAS STOKED!  I hope this is only the beginning of moments where I doubt myself, actually proceed to do what I dream of, and watch the dream come truth. Truth; doubts are inevitable, but confidence is key. You must have confidence if you want to be a success in life. I am thankful after many pitfalls and mistakes my confidence is restored! Vie radio launched last night and shall continue! Please tune in and check out previous shows @ http://www.blogtalkradio.com/vie. Blessings just keep coming, thank you almighty!

Redemption

As much as I was not enthusiastic about Kindergarten I just knew First grade would be different! I was so excited that warm, fall day. I barely slept all night! I had my new, freshly ironed, Navy blue dress (complete with pleats) ready to wear for my first big day. I was living in Louisiana with my grandparents at the time. My mom and dad packed my sister and I into the car and off we went. As I gnawed on breakfast croissant wiches from Burger King the nervousness set in. Would I fit in? Would this experience be like Kindergarten all over again?  Would I have what it takes? I was not so happy and confident as we walked in. Thankfully, the year started without a hitch. Things were great! I made a new best friend almost immediately; Zuri! I had a boyfriend; Roderick! And I thought Sister Mary Francis liked me. Well, once October hit we started reading for the first time. This is where the year shifted for me. I struggled tremendously. Things only got worse when our beloved teacher divided the class into different sections; the advance readers and the slow readers. I was always in the slow group. I thought I was getting better, but I was not. I eventually got tired of trying and just did enough to get by. Sister Mary Francine one told me "You will likely always be in the slow group." That stuck with me for life. She kind of set my tone for education. Everything after that was a blur. I did not care what grades I got, as long as I passed. I never cared for school much after first grade. Things did start to look up by the time I got into 6th grade. I liked Middle school and I wanted to fit in with my uber smart friends so I started to try more than ever. My sister, the genius, always got good grades, so that battle was lost; she was smarter (in my young mind). Sixth grade was when I began to flourish. I was a straight A student. I read better than most of my classmates. WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT THE GIRL WHO WAS ONCE TOLD WOULD "ALWAYS BE IN THE SLOW GROUP" WAS NOW LEADING THE PACK??? Certainly not I! I continued to work hard. A few minor setbacks threatened to change that, but I was relentless to succeed. High school was challenging at times, but it only made me thirstier for greatness. I graduated, went to theatre school, and left all of my past in Phoenix. I thought I would never revisit it, but God had a different plan. He did not want me to run anymore from my struggles and skeletons. He wanted me to face them head on. I moved back 3 years ago from Los Angeles. Straight off the heels of tragedy, I fell into immediate depression. I loved my independence and freedom. I knew that would not be the same in my situation at the moment. After much prayer and help from family, I got my confidence back. I started to think about my college experience in LA and how I always loved writing, but never did it because I did not think I was "smart enough" or a "good reader." I talked to my dad everyday about this and he said, "Punkin, you will never know what you could be until you try." So I did. I signed up for classes at Chandler-Gilbert and I decided NO ONE WOULD TELL ME I WAS NOT SMART ENOUGH!  I went through Chandler-Gilbert with ease. I learned so many interesting things, met some fantastic friends, and found my strength to write again. I decided to stop running from college and applied for ASU. I got in and got right to work. Every class and every teacher  was exactly what I needed to see that I DO love to learn and that I am not dumb, I am in fact very intelligent per my professors. I write constantly in my classes and I love every second of it. With each paper and blog and I only grow stronger in areas where I always fell short. This summer I tackled the biggest beast of all; math. I never cared for math as I was always so terrible at it. Ever since my stellar year of 6th grade math, I continued to fail in Math. I think it was nervousness and apprehension on my part because all my teachers were helpful and fantastic. Well, I finally got my redemption this summer. I took college Algebra ( a class I held off on forever) and through hard work and ingenuity, I GOT AN A+!!!   I could not believe my eyes when I saw my grade! WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THE GIRL WAS ONCE A MATH FAILURE AND BAD READER WOULD MAKE THE DEAN'S LIST AND GET AN A+ IN HER MATH CLASS?? Certainly not I. I could never take credit for any of this because there was a force much bigger propelling me; God. He pushed me to tackle my worst fears, confront my past, and move forward with my life. He has been holding my hand and blessing me the entire time and I could never thank him enough but I know exactly how I can show my appreciation; by continuing to be a success in everything I do because it is not the opinions of a teacher or your friends or family that matters. It is what God thinks of you that matters most and right now I would say he is pretty proud of me, so I am sublimely happy.