Subtle Differences...

So, upon my late night adventures into insomnia, I discovered one of the most poignant and clever pieces of video footage I have witnessed in years; Shit White Girls Say...To Black Girls. At first, I was a little put off by the title and having heard about it all week, I was naturally late on viewing the video. Apparently there are dozens of videos titled "Shit...." and it would be the stuff guys say to girls, gay people, black people, etc. Well this particular video was different. It was popular enough to amass over 6 million views in one week which for YouTube is a smash hit. The creator of the video wanted to comically express her experiences being a black girl around white women and describe some of the crazy, ignorant, and honest things many of these women said to her throughout life. The actual video was a riot as Francesca( creator) was adorned in a long, blonde wig complete with "Valley Girl" accent. She functions throughout the video making short sighted, blatant, and very rude remarks/comments to her black friend (the anonymous but supposed Francesca).

One would think EVERYONE could partake in a little laughter from this truly ridiculous depiction of ignorance well, I was completely wrong. Many viewers of the video said it was racist. This conclusion shocked me. The term racist gets thrown around so much that it has lost its original definition. A racist is a person who believes their race is superior to all others. Prejudice is when someone dislikes a group of people for their own personal reasons (exp. some Christians are prejudice against Muslims because they don't believe in Allah but, Christ). And ignorance is when someone is unaware or uneducated on a subject but decide to discuss it or partake in it anyway. Most of the time this leads to offense being taken and feelings being hurt as does the other terms but, not all ignorant people are racist or prejudice. The terms have small correlations but, they are not the exact same.

Some women viewed this video as racist because it poked fun at a somewhat slanted but, stereotypical view of how some white women act towards black women. Not all, some. The few who felt offended were offended because they misinterpreted what the creator was trying to convey. She wanted to express her experiences on her childhood in predominately white areas through a video much the other "Shit..." series videos, one that was tailor-made to fit her relatable conscious. The fact that anyone took offense is absurd. You cannot be offended at someone else's experience because it is not your own. As long as you are not the woman portrayed in the video, you should never be bothered by someone else's experiences. And if you are bothered maybe there is a reason, maybe you are that stereotypical person who has said and done all those things if not, more.

Francesca Leigh's video and thesis points out a very taboo and controversial conversation; Race Relations. People do not want to have this conversation because they are not prepared. They do not want to talk about their own prejudices out loud fore fear of ostracism. There needs to be at least a small conversation about race in the world in order to heal and help improve relationships. No person should have to endure the poking and prodding and interrogations that Black women, Asian women, Latino women, and many other women face constantly. I am not saying this behavior is exclusive to women of color but, they are almost 90% more likely to be asked these types of questions because they are almost always seen as "foreign" in the eyes of society. Name calling and sensitivity will not improve the issues between races. It is time we stop being cowards, up our respect level, and have the treacherous conversation before another "Shit..." video comes out titled "Shit Closeted Ignorant, Prejudice, and Racist Americans REALLY Think."

The Newness of a Year

So I failed to list some of the highlights and lowblows of my 2011. Well, here they are, the ten goods and bads of my 2011

• I did extremely well at Arizona State University. I am likely to graduate with honors.
• My Great Uncle died, a true blow to the family. R.I.P. Uncle Mike.
• I got a new car, Estelle. She is awesome in an old, slightly dilapidated way.
• I went on a weightless bootcamp and loss 30 lbs and tons of money shopping for my new physique.
• I ended two unhealthy romantic relationships and possibly ruined a friendship beyond repair. Lowblow.
• Found out some saddening news about my health. Definitely one of my low points. Luckily with weightloss, I gained a small slice of redemption .
• I met some of the most incredible people. Some were seasonal and others, luckily, are still around...for now.
• I traveled the majority of my year. I went to Portland for the first time (AAAMAZING!), Los Angeles (just like old times), Louisiana (yet again), Dallas (finally got to enjoy it), San Antonio (first time, looking forward to going back in March), and many other places.
• Had a chill yet exciting 25th birthday spent with someone who is a kind soul. It was nice.
• Had one of the best New Year's Eve's of my life spent entirely with family. I was very grateful!

Overall, 2011 was awesome. I learned so many things about who I really am and where I am going. I learned that sometimes it is ok not to be so nice. In fact, sometimes being guarded is more beneficial to your health. I also learned to make a decision and stand firm on it. It is fairly easy to get distracted but, when you are fully determined, it takes ALOT to sway you. And lastly I learned that it is better to give than receive. I am not the most giving person but, this year I believe I made a breakthrough. I gave more than I received and it felt AAAAMAZZZING! I never ask anyone for gifts for my birthday or any occasion. I am grateful for whatever I get. I always accept everything with love and a smile because some of the things I truly desire no one would know or could purchase. I truly desire solace in a crazy and unjust world, no one can buy me that because it is something only I can get...for myself.

The main thing I want in 2012 is to except whatever I cannot change, appreciate what I DO have, work smarter not harder, build healthy, long-lasting relationships of all kinds, all while strengthening my strained ones, and lastly learn how to just BE for a while. I really want to master the art of meditation because it helped some many people I know focus and center themselves in a crazy world, in turn bringing them solace....and that is just what I need. BRING ON 2012, I AM READY!

Oldies, but Goodies!

There will never in a million years be another film like Disney's Beauty and the Beast! A tale as old as time, a song as old as rhyme, this movie GETS ME EVERYTIME! I have probably watched this it a bajillion times and have never gotten through the entire movie without crying. A gorgeous but, quirky only daughter of a eccentric, French inventor meets her Prince charming after years of boredom in a small, provincial town. An unconventional love story, but a beautiful one nonetheless! I know all the lyrics, scenes, and costumes by heart! The saddest part of your youth (each individual) is that you have to look back and wonder "WHY CAN'T DISNEY MAKE MORE CLASSIC FILMS LIKE THIS?" I mean you have Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, The Little Mermaid, The Lion King, I could go on forever! I feel for the children of the Millennium with their Spy Kids, Wall-E's, and Madagascar's, fore they will never truly experience the wonderment, magic, and beauty of Disney's greatest film moments. Thankfully, DVD/Blue-Ray combo packages offer up quite a variety of Disney classics that will instantly transfer them back to 1954, 1970, 1988, or 1991. I was so saddened by VHS, Beauty and the Beastless lifestyle, that my 25 year old, grown ass ran out to the nearest Wal-Mart at 1:33 am to grab the 3 disk, Blue-Ray combo pack with special behind the scenes footage and of course, the feature film. It was one of the best purchases I have made all year! Now, I can have a lil bit of my former, 5 year old, 90's self in 2011 and right through 2012! This new year is looking better than ever!

Patience is a Virtue

Recently, I have been canoodling with a man that is as complicated as he is attractive. We argue but, have some of the most passionate discussions ever. I love it and hate it at the same time. Needless to say, I have such a splendid with him and for that I am thankful! Now, our greatest debate recently has been over timelines. Timelines in the sense of marriage, relationships, titles, and so much more. Mainly, the title changing from just dating to BOYFRIEND and GIRLFRIEND. His stance is that the only thing that matters is the love, attraction, and the connection shared between the two people. I for one, totally agree, those things are vital, but I do believe you should not rush. I have rushed through tests (never got a grade higher than a B minus), rushed through studying (never remembered ANYTHING), and rushed though dating before (hence why I am currently single). I think there is something special in knowing that the patience you possess can allow you to delve even further into the individual you're cruising. Besides, I never absorbed anything from the things I rushed doing such as studying, tests I rushed taking, or the people I rushed to date. When I was bigger (weight wise), I ate everything so fast because food did not hold significance in my life anymore. I got fat, wasted money, and I DIDN'T EVEN ENJOY THE FOOD! Now that I have lost weight, I have gained a new appreciation for food. I savor every single bite. In turn, I appreciate the content, preparation, and the nutrients. I feel the same rules should apply to relationships and dating. The more time spent, the more your mouth waters for it, you crave it, and hopefully appreciate it more than anything you have ever possessed. The thing is that when you find that certain food, person, or amazing item you enjoy so much taking the time to observe it, feel it, and enjoy only makes your heart grow fonder. SO CHEERS TO ONE OF THE MOST POPULAR YET UNATTAINABLE VIRTUES, PATIENCE! What would life be without it? RUSHED AND BORING!

The Big Nickel

25 is said to be one of the most exciting birthdays ever! A quarter of a century old and yet still so young! I love this age because you are finally not too old, yet not too young at the same time. It is quite exhilarating! This year has been one of many highs and MAJOR lows. Deaths, health scares, money discrepancies, and so much more but, I would not trade it for anything in the world because for the first time in my life, I am completely on track to where I need to be. I anticipate that despite lows, 25 is the beginning of true greatness. I can never say I do not know how to behave, what to want, where I have been, hell even where I am going. All I can ask God is how high? How high can you take me because I truly want to reach the TIP TOP! Thank you 25, just the breath of fresh air I needed!

The Relationship Visa: don't overstay on it!

I got invited to view a free screening of a new film coming out called Like Crazy last night. It was quite a movie to say the least. A cute college couple meet an untimely change in their relationship when the girl is deported for overstaying her visa. This throws them into an unwanted international relationship where they must write, text, call, and do everything but, physically be together. This relationship and movie got me thinking about my future and past. I have had my share of long distance relationships (more than I ever wanted) and I have to say, CALLING IT TOUGH IS AN UNDERSTATEMENT! It is simply put, torture. Never being near that person, no date nights, and feeling lonely all the time are just some of the things you experience. My last major long distance relationship was to result in marriage, but never got there. We could not shake the troubles of our own personal lives to progress to that next level of "til death do us part." I still have not completely gotten over my failed marriage to be. Maybe I never will and this movie reminds me so much of my relationship because they kept going through these incredible bouts of emotional tug of war. When they are together they are happy, a part they are miserable, they date new people and still aren't happy and so much more. The relationship finally comes full circle at the end, but it is too late. They have both overstayed their relationship visas and are now out of love and in an intense gray area of confusion. It is so sad to see love get to this place, but like the movie, such is life. I don't know if I have seen too many happy endings but, I left disappointed. I, being a girl, wanted their marriage and love to be the greatest of all time and reality saw different. I was sad, but I guess I will get over it and maybe even understand it, like in my own life, hopefully.

Sarah Mclachlan-Train Wreck